A popular saying goes,
"Marriage involves three rings: the engagement ring, the wedding ring and
suffering. " However, I believe that normal human beings have the instinct
of finding a mate to complete their life through marriage. Since I was a child,
I had watched a lot of couples on television especially the fairy tales where
the prince charming would ride his white horse to rescue the princess of his
life and propose to her ;thus, I have a dream of getting married to my own
version of prince charming who will take me as his princess. Like any other girls, I have my own type of
person that I want to get married with.
First and foremost, I'm not looking for 'Mr.
Perfect-Looking Guy', but still, I prefer someone who is a good-looking. Maybe
to some people the physical appearance is not important, but to me it is. In my
opinion, I am going to spend my whole life after marriage with that person
under the same roof; therefore, I need someone who can calm me down just by
looking at his adorable face whenever I have to face with difficulties.
Personally, I prefer a handsome guy who is tall and muscular. This is because I
will feel guarded and safe whenever I am around him. He should have a broad
shoulders so that he would be my knight in shining armor that will protect and
cover me whenever I need. I am not discriminating people, but he should also
have a fair skin. I have no valid reason why I prefer a guy who has a fair
skin, but there is an idiom says, "Beauty lies on the eyes of the
beholder." To my eyes, a man who has a fair skin is more attractive than a
man who has a dark skin.
Life is full of challenges and so does marriage. Good
communication is one of the most crucial things in a solid relationship.
According to Fried Nietzsche, "It is not a lack of love, but a lack of
friendship that makes unhappy marriages". Hence, I would want my future
husband to be a friend whom I can easily communicate. He must be frank, honest
and understanding in any kind of situations. I would also want my future
companion to share his thoughts. I would love to hear everything about his
life, family, education, dreams, problems and things he likes or dislikes, so
that we could understand each other better than anyone else do. In return, he also
needs to be interested to know about my past, my current progressions in my
life and my dreams for the future. My friends labeled me as a loquacious type
of person, so he must be someone who would enjoy to listen to my stories too.
Whenever I have my ups and downs in life, he would be there for me, listen to
my problems and try his best to comfort me and support me. He would also be the
one who will not only focus on the flaws in every situation or problem that we
are facing at that moment, but see the silver lining behind every cloud.
In the song 'As Long As You Love Me' by Justin Bieber,
there is a verse that has a meaning that he would not mind to be starving,
homeless and broke as long as the girl he loves, loves him back and she is
willing to live with him together. To some girls, the lyrics might be sweet and
romantic, but in my point of view, no matter how much I love my future consort,
I still need him to provide me shelter, food and money for living. I truly
understand that money cannot buy us happiness, but as you can see nowadays,
there are a lot of married couples are facing difficulties or even worse, getting
a divorce because of financial problem. For this reason, I would want my future
spouse to have a stable career such as a doctor or diplomat and have a good
financial support. He does not have to be rich like Bill Gates or Donald Trump;
as long as he is capable to provide me with the basic necessities of life, I
will be satisfied enough. However, if he could provide me a huge bungalow with
a swimming pool, an elegant car, branded items and expensive jewelries -- that will
be a bonus.
Above all other qualities, the perfect spouse is the one
who is religious. I strongly believe that if a person who has strong faith and relationship
with the God, he would have a good character. For instance, he would respect
and love his wife from the bottom of his heart. He would also try his best to
guide her to the correct path to be a better Muslimah. Another reason why I
would want to get married with someone who is religious is because he would have
a good heart which can make me feel blessed whenever I am with him. Other than
that, he would correct me if I have ever done anything wrong in my life whether
it is opposed to our religion or our culture. Imagine if you got married to
someone who is not religious? If he could not keep a good relationship with the
Lord of Universe, how would he keep a good relationship with me? If he is loyal
to Allah as His servant from the day he was born, then at least I can assure
that he will be loyal and faithful to me as well. With this in mind, I will
promise my total loyalty and faithfulness to my future spouse.
To sum up, there is a lot of other qualities that make a
prefect husband material to me. While it is easy for me to make lists, but to
find a the man that live up with the type that I want is difficult; therefore,
I must hold to the saying, "Nobody is perfect". Instead of focusing
on my requisitions on the type of person I want to get married with, I think I
should look at myself in the mirror and recognize my own imperfections. If that
person is my soul mate who is made especially for me, I should accept him the
way he is as my own version of prince charming and live together happily-ever-after.
As Barnett Bricker said, "Success in marriage does not come merely through
finding the right mate, but through being the right mate."
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